I hope you’ve had a chance today to reflect upon all the blessings that life has thrown your way. You didn’t pay Jimbo Fisher $8 million to lose four football games (so far) this season. You’re not really jazzed that Jeremy Pruitt has finally gotten you back to (checks notes) six wins.
You’re not counting down the months until Gus Malzahn’s buyout becomes manageable. And you’re not relying on Dan Mullen to either recruit or game manage you back to an SEC title.
And perhaps best of all, you are not a Georgia Tech fan. It’s hard to imagine something worse than the eternal gridiron purgatory of knowing that your school will in all likelihood not become truly relevant in college football during your lifetime. Really, at the rate one is gaining ground and the other losing it Georgia State is no more than a decade and a half from supplanting the Jackets as the biggest college football draw in Atlanta. And that’s pretty hilarious.
We joke about Georgia Tech no longer really being relevant. But it’s not really a joke. The Jackets have never won an ACC Championship Game that wasn’t later vacated for cheating. The school where “eVeRyBoDy HaZ To TakE KalkuLuS!!! once had athletes declared ineligible in four sports because their compliance staff literally couldn’t count correctly.
The last class of Georgia Tech football players to graduate without losing to Georgia was the class of 1956. The Bulldogs have had 16 classes pull off a four year win streak since then. The last time you could look back over the preceding ten years and say Tech won more than they lost was in 1963. Georgia Tech has three fight songs which refer to the University of Georgia by name. Georgia has none which officially reference the trade school.
All of which is to say, this is normally where I’d reference the things Georgia must do to triumph in two days, and some additional things that have begun to worry me since GlimmerTwinDawg provided the official list of things to worry about. Not this time.
Instead, I’m going to encourage you to enjoy tonight’s Egg Bowl, a little ball of deep fried hate between two fanbases whose pettiness makes my own ambivalence to the presence of our ACC coevals (sic) pale in comparison. The game is at 7:30 on ESPN. I’m rooting for spite, and there’s no way I can lose.
And while I’m watching I intend to sip on some homemade egg nog.
12 large eggs
1-1/2 cups granulated sugar
1/2 teaspoon salt
8 cups whole milk, divided (not 2%, and God knows not skim, you heathens)
2 tablespoons vanilla extract
1 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1/4 teaspoon grated cinnamon
2 cups heavy whipping cream
bourbon to taste
a working thermometer
In a heavy saucepan, whisk together the eggs, sugar and salt. Slowly add 4 cups of the milk, cook and stir over low heat until a thermometer reads 160°-170°, (roughly 30 minutes). Do not allow to boil. Transfer to a large bowl.Stir in the vanilla, nutmeg, cinnamon, and remaining milk. Place bowl in an ice-water bath, stirring until milk mixture is cool. (If mixture separates, process in a blender until smooth.) Refrigerate, covered, until cold (probably 2 hours, give or take).To serve, beat cream until soft peaks form. Whisk gently into cooled milk mixture. Stir in the bourbon of your choice in the amount of your choice. Personally, I use Evan Williams, because it’s a decent mixer, reasonably priced, and this is one application where its sweetness is an asset. But you do you, egg nog drinker.
Everybody have a great evening, and . . .