As you may have noticed, it's Friday and there is no college football this weekend. That's a problem. Our solution? Free-form Friday, a loosely organized compendium of miscellany, doodads, and banal banter all designed to help you get through to the weekend. Free-form Friday is filmed live in front of a studio audience, in glorious smell-o-vision. Maestro, the theme music:
While there is no college football this weekend, there is the Super Bowl, the last desperate gasp of the NFL season. If you haven't been paying attention, this year's game pits the Carolina Panthers against the Denver Broncos. Carolina is quarterbacked by Cam Newton, who attended Auburn (albeit for one semester), after having attended Florida. I hate Auburn. And the only thing I hate more than Auburn is Florida. Denver is quarterback by Peyton Manning. Peyton Manning went to Tennessee, and frankly I don't particularly care for Tennessee either.
You can see how this one is kind of complicated for me. The saving grace in terms of my rooting interest is the fact that the Carolina Panthers have several former Georgia Bulldogs on the squad, including the NFLPA's newly minted Byron White Award winner, Thomas Davis. I suppose if Cammie Cam has to win a Super Bowl in order for a handful of Georgia Bulldogs to do the same, I can grit my teeth, hold my nose, and cheer for it to happen. I just hope Manning doesn't send anyone to my door to ask why I did it. He's got a habit of that, apparently.
It's really a study in contrasts, the battle between Manning and Newton. The cagey veteran versus the young upstart. The pizza pitchman vs. the Under Armour spokesguy. Yucking it up at Kenny Chesney shows vs. dabbing in the endzone.
All of which got me thinking, who would win a contest between Manning and Newton in things other than football? For example:
1) a blueberry pie eating contest
2) a choreographed laser avoidance routine like Catherine Zeta-Jones performed in "Entrapment."
3) a game of Hungry, Hungry Hippos
4) 9 holes of putt-putt golf at Shipwreck Island in Hilton Head.
My guess? Peyton wins the pie eating contest. That sounds like something the Mannings probably do every 4th of July. But there's no way his back allows him to do any sort of sexy, catsuit gyrations to further a heist with Sean Connery. Cam wins that one hands down. I also suspect that Newton's hand-eye coordination is superior at this point, making him a Hungry, Hungry hip-hop endzone celebration hero. That being said, I suspect Peyton has more time for golf these days, and would have the advantage in the rolling one into the clown's mouth department.
feel free to include your predictions for this weekend's Super Bowl, as well as the above far more important competitions in the comments below. As usual, also feel free to discuss anything else that pops into your collective heads. Everybody have a great weekend…
Feel free to include your predictions for this weekend's Super Bowl, as well as the above far more important competitions in the comments below. If you can think of some other battles you'd like to see these network stars lock horns in, we'll take those too. As usual, also feel free to discuss anything else that pops into your collective heads. Everybody have a great weekend…