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Early Open Comment Thread: Gator Hater Edition

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West Virginia v Texas Tech Photo by John Weast/Getty Images

Only a few hours separate you from the — renewal of the World’s Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party. How do you plan to fill the hours?

Drinking is always an option. Considering what the aBulldogs have to do to pull this one off is another. Or, you could tuck into a heaping plate of other college football action.

As RedCrake noted earlier this week there are, in the words of Archduke Lesley Miles, some damn strong football teams playing in the noon hour. The bad news is that none of them are playing each other. The “WTH happened to Dantonio’s team?” tour continues with the Michigan State Spartans taking on Jim Harbaugh’s Michigan Wolverines, who continue to pile up victories on the way to their eventual loss to Ohio State. That one’s on ESPN.

Speaking of the Buckeyes, newly ranked Penn State, fresh off a victory over Ohio State, travels to Purdue for a noon ESPN2 start against Purdue. Let’s go ahead and say it: losing on the road to the train wreck that is Purdue football right now after the biggest win of his Nittany Lion tenure would be the most James Franklin thing to do here.

#5 Louisville travels to Charlottesville to take on UVA on ABC. At some point during the third quarter Lamar Jackson will actually rip the Brooks Brothers tie off some kid in the front row and wear it around his head like a drunken accountant at an office party. Except on his way to his eighth touchdown of the day and a Heisman Trophy.

Kentucky and Missouri square off on the SEC Network in a matchup of teams Georgia’s just trying really hard to stay ahead of in the SEC East race. Somebody check behind me, but if I’m matching right, a Georgia win in Jacksonville and a Wildcat victory in Columbia would put Kentucky in control of its own destiny in the SEC East. Everything that we know is at an end. Cthulhu on line 1. It’s for you.

Finally, undefeated, #10 West Virginia travels to Oklahoma State to take on the Cowboys. Dana Holgorsen is working on the season that will end in him turning an abandoned coal mine into a cave lair in the hills. It’ll have skeeball and a kegerator.

We’ll be back later with the first half open thread for the only game that really matters today. Until then . . .

Go ‘Dawgs!!!