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Getting Drafty: Generating Your Personal NFL Draft Scouting Report

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Brad Penner-USA TODAY Sports

Every year NFL scouts put together in-depth profiles of thousands of draft-eligible players. Don't get me wrong, I applaud their thorough work. Plus employing those guys as scouts is good for the economy, sort of a New Deal for the no neck, ex-jock crowd.

But the thing is, and there's no nice way to put this, most of those guys are never setting foot on an NFL field. Over the course of seven rounds 256 players will be selected in the 2015 NFL Draft, and a lot of those won't make it out of training camp. In this respect, they have just as much business walking across a stage to shake hands with Roger Goodell as you do.

Which brings me to an important point: why aren't you being scouted? I mean, you were among the best JV defensive ends Fulton County produced during the late 1990's. You've probably still got some gas left in the tank.

That's why I'm proud to present, direct from the minds of the Vox Media product team, the B.S. NFL Draft profile generator. Just put in your name and find out what the greatest minds in pro football would probably have to say about you. We'll be back this afternoon with more draft coverage. Until then, keep your hips loose, your arms long, and ....

Go 'Dawgs!!!