(This picture has been lawya'd)
As one might expect, with the level of traffic we regularly receive at Dawg Sports, we show up in a lot of search results. Generally, most of our search-result visitors have entered something fairly predictable, like "Georgia Bulldogs football," "did Georgia win last night," "Jürgen Klinsmann Fussball Gott," or something like that. (Ok, not that last one. But still.)
And then, we have the outliers. Any comments by me are in (parentheses) below, and I have excluded all of the NSFW results. All of the following search terms have been used to reach a page or picture on the dawgsports.com website within the last 7 days:
(Warning: If you're sensitive about such things, there is one curse word/phrase in the results that overly sensitive people might find shocking, disgusting, and below someone with my reputation and track record.) (Waves at trolls.)
- famiglia addams
- can you get bacon at chickfila (Can you get syrup at Waffle House?)
- vince dooley was 2-4 against alabama (PPAAAWWWWWWLLL)
- its just fine to see your face at my door
- 7 of 9
- student thinking at desk
- teethbrush
- i'm always bored
- he runs like welshman
- leonard part 6
- a herd of cattle (the priceless component of this search term is that it came from India)
- bubba watson sober
- letter to borrow things
- what is the uga dawg uga worth (Answer: Your life, son)
- kids stealing (#thUGA)
- nike pro long jump
- one day you realise you're the disappointment
- chlamydia meme (Apparently, it's Dawg Sports)
- tasmanian devil rocks
- really your post is really very good and i appreciate it. it's hard to sort the good from the bad sometimes, but i think you've nailed it. you write very well which is amazing. i really impressed by your post.
- is red pants fashion so 2006?
- unfairness revenge
- tottenham hotspur fans in south carolina (Looks at RedCrake) (LOLOLOL)
- diamond island movies
- why does early not like auburn
- i went on vacation left on probation
- don't suffer for nobody
- drunk man holding crate of beers
- bad johnny
- losing my mind
- what does audemus jura nostra defendere mean
- los de madagascar2 alex y su padre
- bad cell reception in stadiums
- john adams in drawing
- ringo star album cover
- morpheus captured
- if your school is not the #1 party school, make it the #1 party school
- pictures of confederate soldiers monuments
- big clock in texas (What time is it?)
- tru calling
- mike's secret stuff
- god damn gators
- i think it's photoshopped
- pictures of animated poison bottle
- soldier flag running
- james dean giant (Ho ho ho "dean giant")
- daisy chain
From the "How do I Internet" department:
- are the non donation seats for georgia bulldogs football (No. No, they are not.)
- quarterback schos (Welcome to Dawg Sports, Congresswoman Corrine Brown.)
- memmorail day comments
- georgia and luissiana softball game
- lewis gizzard
- 2012 bulldog feet ball team
- georgia bulldogs dawgs every pitchers of isaiah crowell (How do I SEO a google search?)
- world's most inter
- bull dog hort them song
- muppets fuzzy bear
- png bild donald duck
- numbers for victory master nation basketballs
From the "Dang, are you in the wrong place" department:
- ohio state helmet stickers
- ohio spelled in cursive
- scoring in netball
- ou to sec
- mia hamm baby pictures
- picture of live baylor bear
- man kiss
- tail number for virginia tech airplanes
- zero kraken (We prefer ALL. THE. KRAKEN around here)
- big hairy spider front
- los angeles memorial coliseum
- usa interest rates
- gladiator boots for women
- chimpanzee close up
- pictures of athletic alligators
And finally, this week's edition of the Dawg Wørd(s) Mad Lib, where the blanks are filled in with (mostly) randomly chosen search terms:
Corch Irvin Meyers was sitting in his office one day, busily studying film of _sailor robin_. He absentmindedly glanced over to a piece of paper on his desk listing Ohio State's future schedules, and suddenly yelled, "_Big hairy spiders_!! Who the heck put Georgia on the schedule in 2020 and 2021?" Jim Tressel, who was quietly listening in (as he always does), said, "Yeah, I knew about that last April." Corch Meyers was livid. He insisted that only _king and queens hanoverian_ could have possibly thought that playing an SEC team was a good idea, and demanded that the AD cancel the game immediately. "I don't care who you put on the schedule in their place. Why don't you call _cosmetic fsu_, or _hockey guy_, or even _piedmont driving club_ for all I care. Those jerks stomped on my field once, and I don't want no dang _midriff exposed_ in the endzone if they ever play here. If we could lose to _dragon con after hours_, we could lose to Georgia, and I just don't want to take that chance." THE Athletic Director said, "But what about _hillbilly electric boat_?" "I ain't hearing nothing about it," Corch said in response. "If Georgia ain't off the schedule by the end of the week, I'm resigning to go spend more time with my _romanian band music_." So THE AD of THE Ohio State University called THE Greg McGarity, cancelled the game, and promised to make it up to him with _gingerbread man torture_. McGarity reluctantly accepted.