Barometer or Thermometer? Week 6

While perusing RedCrake's excellent College Football TV Schedule (which might be the greatest thing on the internet other than photos of Bar Rafaeli), there are many excellent choices to highlight in this week's edition of Barometer - a game which basically gives an indication where any given program is at the current time. Or Thermometer - a game which, if your team loses, the coach of one or both of the combatants might just end up like this former Georgia Tech assistant:

Arkansas @ Auburn (12:00 Noon , ESPN2)

Can you imagine what would happen down on the Plains if Arkansas were to actually regroup enough to whip Auburn in another Made-For-Jefferson-Pilot 11:00 A.M. CST starts? Arkansas is a dumpster fire, no question. And at this point one has to wonder if Jonelle Smith has completely lost control of his bowels team. Auburn's defense played very well against LSU (who hasn't?) a few weeks ago and methinks Auburn wins easily. But, man this one has the potential to set a record breaking heat-wave down there.

Verdict: Thermometer...Big Time!

Georgia Tech @ Clemson (3:30, ESPN)

Did you watch Middle Tennessee State hack Tech's Grohvalicious defense to bits last Saturday as you were warming up for the UT - Dawgs matchup? Of course you did. Tech's season is spiraling out of control and Clemson is a very talented team on both sides of the ball. I've got some Tech family and friends who have pretty much had it with the Paul Johnson experiment. His seat has gone from smoldering to a flickering flame. Having said this, watch Clemson gaak this one up. Just watch. It's what they do. Tech wins this game. And Dabo orders some asbestos Y-fronts.

Verdict: The Thermometer Game of the Week

LSU @ Gatuh (3:30, CBS)

Florida is improving and LSU doesn't appear to have any consistency on offense at all. I know Florida is the sexy/trendy pick right now, but I think LSU will probably squeak by in another 11 - 9 type Les Miles weird-fest football game. In fact, with :32 seconds left to go, Miles will call a play that is executed rather clumsily, but works out anyway. However...if Florida does win, I think things down in Red Stick begin to get really interesting really fast for a coach who has never been totally embraced by his fan-base.

Verdict: Thermometer, Runner up Game of the Week

Oklahoma @ Texas Tech (3:30, The WeatherChannel)

Oklahoma is underachieving and Landry Jones, the Sooner QB, has seen his stock fall as he's become an interception machine. Texas Tech is a school that plays football. I really can't tell you much more than that since Mike Leach left, Adam James escaped from the broom closet, and Craig James hooked up with Pam Ward. She's in danger. Oklahoma better win.

Verdict: Thermometer

Miami vs. Notre Dame (7:30, NBC)

If I had one wish, I'd wish for a Georgia victory (or World Peace). If I had two wishes, I'd wish for a Georgia victory (or World Peace) and for Miami to whip Notre Dame so everyone would STFU about the Fighting Irish already. Please, Miami - Save us. Save us all!

Verdict: Thumb Screws and Mr. Boston Vodka

USCw @ Utah (9:00, ESPNU)

I doubt the Trojans lose this game, but if they did then I could envision some heat in a hurry for a guy who still has no business coaching anyone at any level. Having said this, I think he'd make a great fit at Arkansas. They need to try a one-year project...

Verdict: Thermometer

There you have it, folks. Notice a trend? Lot's of 3-Alarm derriere's are at risk this weekend.

I bid you all good evening and Go Dawgs!