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Too Much Information: Georgia Bulldogs v. Coastal Carolina Chanticleers

It has been an uncommonly long week in Bulldog Nation, but Friday afternoon finally has arrived, and, with it, your expectation that I will be providing you with Too Much Information.

That represents a bit of a challenge, inasmuch as we are, after all, talking about the Coastal Carolina Chanticleers, about whom I went on in greater than deserved detail in the Maple Street Press annual and in the summer, and about whom NCT has offered a thorough current update and RedCrake has told you everything else you need to know. Moreover, CCU is a Division I-AA opponent that has never previously taken the field against the Georgia Bulldogs. What more do you need to know? There isn’t enough information left even to give you a little bit of information, much less an excessive amount of it. All right, here’s what I can tell you:

They need more ‘Dawgs. Last night, Mississippi State needed more cowbell, but, tomorrow, the Chanticleers need more ‘Dawgs. That, at least, is what Coastal Carolina head coach David Bennett would have you believe, complete with an accompanying dance mix, though, to be fair, Coach Bennett would also have you believe that Georgia is in better shape than the Bulldogs’ 0-2 record suggests, which you are free to take either as an encouraging sign or as a Vince Dooley-like praise for the Red and Black’s third-string left-handed longsnapper, who may be the best of his breed in the nation.

Coastal Carolina University, which was founded as a junior college in 1954, is a party school liberal arts university near Myrtle Beach. Coastal boasts the Palmetto State’s most ridiculous poultry-based mascot, which is saying something, and I’m reasonably certain that the only regular contributor here at Dawg Sports who pronounced "Chanticleer" correctly the first time is NCT.

All kidding aside, though, Coastal and Coach Bennett field a pretty solid football team. The Chants are 2-0, having outlasted Furman by a touchdown in the season opener and beaten Catawba by three scores last weekend. This will be CCU’s first road game of 2011, and Coach Bennett appears enthused about his team’s opportunity, as he remarked: "Going to Sanford Stadium, between the hedges, that's college football at its finest. We can't worry about the score. We've got to go play the game."

Unfortunately, I have to worry about the score, because you’re expecting me to make a prediction. Here, then, is my method for making a forecast: Georgia scored 21 points in its first game and 42 points in its second game, while the Bulldogs gave up 35 points to open the season and 45 points a week later. Clearly, we have a pattern; the Red and Black double their offensive output each week, and concede ten more points each Saturday than they did the Saturday before. Hence, it is obvious that the Classic City Canines will beat the Coastal Carolina Chanticleers by a final score of 84-55.

I kid, I kid. Basically, I agree with MaconDawg’s assessment, though I’ll break it down for you by quarters. Georgia will play an unfocused first quarter, at the end of which the ‘Dawgs will lead, 14-7. The Red and Black will wake up in the second quarter, scoring 21 points to the Chants’ three. A Bulldog touchdown in the third quarter will represent the only points of the period, and the fourth quarter will feature a plethora of bench players, producing a Georgia field goal and a Coastal touchdown in the final 15 minutes. For the benefit of those of you who were promised there would be no math, that adds up like this:

My Prediction: Georgia 45, Coastal Carolina 17.

Go ‘Dawgs!