It’s a new week, which means it’s time for a new SEC Power Poll ballot. If you spot any inconsistencies between this and my BlogPoll ballot, well, in the words of Walt Whitman: "Do I contradict myself? Very well, then I contradict myself, I am large, I contain multitudes." That, and I haven’t gotten a lot of sleep the last couple of weekends, so there’s a fair to middling chance I’m just not making a lick of sense.
If so, feel free to let me know in the comments, but, for whatever it’s worth, here’s my assessment of the Southeastern Conference, as matters presently stand. (Not so fast, Texas A&M!)
1. Alabama Crimson Tide (2-0): Though you could as easily justify putting Louisiana State here, I’m giving ‘Bama more credit for beating Penn State than I’m giving the Bayou Bengals for beating Oregon. Why? Have you seen any wraparound ads for the Pac-12 Network on this site lately? Well, O.K., then.
2. LSU Tigers (2-0): Les Miles is going to have to step up his game if he doesn’t want to be lapped by this guy.
3. Florida Gators (2-0): Given the schedule they’ve played so far, I have no basis for placing the Sunshine State Saurians higher than Arkansas or South Carolina . . . no basis other than every nightmare I’ve endured in the last 20 years, that is!
4. Arkansas Razorbacks (2-0): Listen, when we get into conference play, gripes about Boise State’s strength of schedule are fair game, but, until the Hogs actually
man pig up and play someone, I don’t want to hear about the easy row the Broncos have to hoe.
5. South Carolina Gamecocks (2-0): I wanted to rank the Palmetto State Poultry higher, but, after USC’s narrow escape from Sanford Stadium in a game both sides thought the ‘Cocks would win handily, I felt compelled either to rank Georgia higher or rank South Carolina lower. Yeah, you knew which way that one was going, didn’t you?
6. Auburn Tigers (2-0): If I can credit the Bulldogs with a moral victory, am I also allowed to dock Gene Chizik for suffering moral defeats?
7. Mississippi St. Bulldogs (1-1): It could’ve been worse. Tommy Tuberville could’ve been there to make a smart-aleck comment about the need to run the ball to win in the SEC.
8. Georgia Bulldogs (0-2): Yes, the ‘Dawgs are 0-2; a lot of teams would be if they’d played the Classic City Canines’ early season schedule. The Red and Black’s solid effort against a strong opponent on Saturday offers some hope of an upcoming surge. (Please let there be a surge. Please let there be a surge!)
9. Vanderbilt Commodores (2-0): The Music City Mariners have a win over a team from an automatically-qualifying BCS conference. Yes, Connecticut still counts. No, really, it does.
10. Tennessee Volunteers (2-0): The Vols are basically Arkansas with a worse color scheme and a bigger stadium. Well, that, and a win over Cincinnati that was tied at 14 after the first quarter in Knoxville.
11. Mississippi Rebels (1-1): Ole Miss is going to peak right before Georgia arrives in Oxford. I know it. I just know it.
12. Kentucky Wildcats (2-0): I know, they’re undefeated. They also trailed Central Michigan by a touchdown at halftime in Lexington. The ‘Cats are the shakiest 2-0 team in the league, which is saying something in a conference whose 2-0 teams include Auburn, Tennessee, and Vanderbilt.
Every bit of that could be wrong. In fact, that likely would be the way to bet, so, should the spirit so move you, feel free to correct my errors in the comments below. Please, though, be nice about it.