Bumped. Just the facts. GO BRUINS. -N

I cross posted this at my blog as well, but wanted to share this with you.

After Saturday's debacle, I did a little digging around on the level of sucktitude that UCLA football has been dragged through over the past five years. We all know about the painful losses, the terrible record against ranked opponenets and on the road, but I wanted to take a look at how much more often UCLA has been blown out in the Dorrell era compared to seasons past. I went back to what individuals generally regard as the beginning of the modern era for UCLA football, which begins with the Red Sanders era.

I defined a blowout loss as any loss in which UCLA lost by more than 30 points.

The results are not pretty.

Anything look out of whack there? It's simple math: since Dorrell has taken over, UCLA is essentially four times more likely to suffer a blowout loss than previously.

Prior to Dorrell's arrival, UCLA suffered a 30+ point loss once every four years when extrapolated across a 12-game season (13 total blowout losses in 585 total games, or 2.22% of the time).

Since Dorrell has arrived, UCLA has suffered four 30+ blowout losses, which averages out to once every year (4 total blowout losses in 53 total games, or 7.55% of the time).

I noticed there appeared to be a void in the many updated coaches as South Park entries for 2007 - the SEC one was hilarious (the shot of Nick Saban really is priceless). But alas, there was no Pac-10 version for 2007! So, that said, I decided to remedy that. I couldn't really pass up the opportunity to poke some more fun at Pete Carroll, and hell, Dennis Erickson is a waiting mine-field of comedic joy. He's almost as vulnerable as Saban - not quite, though.

At any rate, here are your 2007 Pac-10 conference coaches. Cross-posted from my own blog, but figured I'd share with you guys over here. Karl of course retains his handy playbook - no doubt to easily refer to the run, run, pass combinations he and Norvell will through at defenses this year. And of course, Pete Carroll is just so happy to be watched on high by a chorus of angels. He'll get through thanking them, just as soon as he gets back from skateboarding and body-surfing in Hermosa Beach. He has to work on his tan, after all.

And Jim Harbuagh really likes his whip. He plans on using it on his offensive line after they fold under defensive pressure. And then everyone will run wind sprints. Five times. In the sun.

Mike Stoops just wants another beer.

The not-so-obvious question after last Saturday's amazing win against USC is simple: Uh, so, now what?

The conventional wisom is that the USC win saved Karl Dorrell's job. That much seems obvious enough. With respect to thoughts otherwise here, I don't think even with a loss to Florida State that Dorrell loses his job. Now, there's no way UCLA should lose that game. FSU's offense is terrible, run by an even worse Offensive Coordinator than Jim Svoboda.

That said, changes need to be made on the UCLA coaching staff, and I don't doubt that they will. So what are the options?

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So I was over at SI's page today, begrudginly reviewing their Power Rankings for college basketball, and came upon this gem from Luke Winn:

Forgive me if I'm already thinking about next year in L.A. college hoops. Not that the scene right now is lacking; it's just a little imbalanced, what with the Bruins in the top five and USC in the middle of the Pac-10. The 2007-08, season, however, is going to serve as a showcase for arguably the nation's two best freshmen. Oregon-bred big man Kevin Love, whom coach Ben Howland called "the best outlet passer I've seen at any level since Bill Walton," will be starting in Westwood -- and No. 1 overall prospect O.J. Mayo, a combo guard who's the latest in the LeBron-Oden line of super-hyped prospects, will be playing for the Trojans. Mayo advisor Rodney Guillory told the L.A. Times, "He wanted to ink himself as the individual that changed USC basketball forever, like Patrick Ewing at Georgetown or Sean Elliott at Arizona."

Uh, what the hell?  You rank UCLA #3 and you spend HALF THE FREAKIN' ARTICLE TALKING UP USC BASKETBALL?!  What the hell is wrong with you?  If you're going to spend some time talking down UCLA basketball, at least do it with something related to this year, like our shaky 3-pt defense, or our struggles at the free-throw line.

BUT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, at least come in with something that applies at least a little bit.  Talking about how next year's going to be great for USC while ostensibly supposed to be doing some critiquing/analysis of UCLA basketball is not only asinine, it's damn insulting.

And comparing USC to UCLA in terms of basketball just makes my skin want to crawl.  USC hasn't done jack in basketball yet and already Winnie's on their jock.  Imagine if they happen to win something like 10 games next year.

Ugh.

I checked up on the campus rag this AM to see if they had anything positive to say about the weekend...I was expecting something along the lines of:

"Yes, we lost, but the weather sure was great!  And if the game had been 59 minutes long, we would have won!  Yay UCLA!"

Instead, I actually encountered what I could only describe as reality:

The UCLA defense played one of the most inspired games I've ever seen a defense play. It made a Notre Dame offense loaded with weapons look like a flustered high school team.

And Pat Cowan - making his second career start in one of the most pressured situations conceivable - played like a warrior, making big play after big play when the Bruins needed them most.

And for 57 minutes and 40 seconds, Karl Dorrell and the UCLA coaching staff called a great game, putting their players in a position to win a game that nobody gave them a chance to win.

But what happened in the last two minutes and 20 seconds was gut-wrenching, painful and, above all, irritating.

After 57 minutes and 40 seconds of being smart, the UCLA coaching staff decided to sacrifice smart for 'safe.' The coaches decided that rather than try to win the game, they would try not to lose it.

Wow.  Reality has finally set in, I guess.  I'd disagree a little bit with Cowan making big play after big play.  Cowan had a couple of shots to make some plays on the outside in single coverage, and didn't convert.  He played well, but I wouldn't exactly say he made play after play.

Bumped - Nestor

HT to Burnt Orange Nation for the idea.

From the 'keeping your friends close and your enemies closer' department, there's been quite a lot of noise coming out of Tempe this weekend.  On Friday, Arizona State coach Dirk Koetter named senior Sam Keller the starting quarterback.  Then, uh, some things changed.  Following a bit of soul searching on Saturday, Koetter changed his mind and named sophmore Rudy Carpenter the starter.

From ESPN:

"It's simple. I made a mistake on the quarterback situation and I'm changing my mind," Koetter said after Sunday's workout. "We're going to start Rudy Carpenter. I've excused Sam Keller from practice to consider his options."

Koetter said he couldn't sleep on Friday after naming Keller the starter. He said he then sought out advice from his athletic director, coaching staff, senior players and "unity group" on Saturday.

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