Oh, You Were Finished? Well, Allow Me to Retort!

by T Kyle King on Apr 10, 2006 4:22 PM EDT in Events

There is a venerable adage, both in litigation and in history, that, when you have one witness, you know the facts, but, when you have two or more witnesses, you're never sure. So it is with Bloggerpalooza '06.

My take on the day's events was offered at Dawg Sports yesterday. Doug's conflicting version appeared at Hey Jenny Slater earlier this afternoon.

I will not dignify Doug's "creative" account with a response, except to say that (a) whatever he tells you about whether the birds were singing is an absolute fabrication, (b) that Kirk Herbstreit character had some nerve talking trash about the Red and Black after what Georgia's defense did to the pretty-boy Q.B. in the 1993 Citrus Bowl, and (c) Doug left out the part where Jim Tressel showed up to compliment him on looking so snappy in his red sweater vest. (Wait 'til Doug posts the pictures and you'll see what I mean.)

In all seriousness, Doug, Ann, Trav, and I had a good time, despite the small turnout brought about by the perfect storm of Orson's sister's wedding, Paul's bad case of bed head, and The Drizzle's aversion to rain (which, come to think of it, may explain why he's called "The Drizzle" and not "The Torrential Downpour").

Next time, we'll know to follow these simple rules of planning a tailgate:

Remember the old Japanese saying: "When planning a tailgate, plan a tailgate."
Exchange cell phone numbers in advance so that communication will be possible between the time you leave the house and the time you meet at the Arch.
In case the first and second rules are not followed properly, have some idea of the other guys' real names and their physical appearance so that you don't run the risk of walking right by one another without knowing who the other fellow is.
As in all other instances, inform your relatives that they should plan their weddings so as to avoid conflicts with Georgia football games. (In Orson's sister's defense, though, a bride with a sibling who is a Florida fan probably is justified in not checking to see when the Georgia spring scrimmage is scheduled before setting a date for her big day.)

In other words, next time, we'll act as if we're people whose interaction isn't solely confined to the internet but who are, instead, real human beings who behave like folks who know one another.

It's a stretch, I know, but I'm confident we'll get there eventually . . . if only so some group of clever rivals doesn't get the opportunity to raise $12,000.00 and put up a billboard near the North Campus Parking Deck that reads, "Shouldn't Bloggerpaloozas be Attended by More Than Four?"

Go 'Dawgs!

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It's because I bring the rains of justice.

Pretty much all of those rules occurred to me around midnight Friday night, at which point I thought things like, when I get up at 7 in the morning, I really can't check and see if others are there, rain be damned, or if it is raining like a mother when I get there and there's no way to hang around exposed landmarks, am I going to go stumping through parking decks for people that I couldn't possibly recognize and can't call.

Ah well, as my Tech friends like to say, it never rains on Grant Field. And likewise, you never plan on having a deluge on the day of your spring game. On the upside, no matter how many come next year or how big it grows in the coming years, no one but you four can say that you were the OG's of the proceedings.

by The Drizzle on Apr 11, 2006 12:44 AM EDT 0 recs

Truly our bad

Next year, we'll coordinate better, Drizzle.

If this thing continues, we definitely plan to make Bloggerpalooza '06 the "fish story" in weblogging history.

"I remember back in '06 . . . the forecast called for 15 hurricanes, but we came, anyway! The field was ankle-deep in rainwater and 12 twisters were visible beyond the end zones---not to mention the one at the 50 yard line---and the lightning was so constant it made up for the fact that dark clouds had blotted out the sun, but, by golly, we stayed!"

I'm sorry about all the confusion. We'll do a better job next spring.

By the way, why does it never rain at Grant Field?

by T Kyle King on Apr 11, 2006 7:20 AM EDT up 0 recs

Why does it never rain at Grant Field?

Because God knows the Yellowjackets need all the help they can get!

rimshot

by ACG on Apr 11, 2006 10:31 AM EDT up 0 recs

Grant Field

Heck if I know, so I'll ride with the previous answer.

All I know is everytime that there's any sort of forecast for rain and they start to get excited about an all day tailgate or something, I'll tell them, it's going to be raining all over you dude.

And they'll claim that no matter when and where it rains in time and space, that come game time, it always breaks and never rains on Grant Field.

Of course, I've watched parts of multiple games there while getting wet, so that's a load of crap in my opinion, but they need something to cling to.

by The Drizzle on Apr 11, 2006 11:57 AM EDT 0 recs

I heard a joke similar to that statement

and it goes like this:

"Have you heard that Georgia Tech has devised a new severe-weather response plan that involves evacuating all students and faculty into Bobby Dodd Stadium in case of a tornado? Apparently there's hardly ever a touchdown there."

Thank you, ladies and gentlemen. I'll be here all night. Try the veal, it's excellent.

"Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'sir' without adding 'you're making a scene.' " -- Homer Simpson

by Doug on Apr 11, 2006 12:27 PM EDT 0 recs