Editor's note: This post grew out of a series of tweets by various people over the past couple of days. Mine below aren't even close to the funniest of the bunch. I urge you to search the hashtag #SECThanksgiving for all the rest, or visit our SB Nation colleagues at Good Bull Hunting for a selection of some of the best.
No other conference in college football has the same weird pseudo-family vibe as the SEC. There are a host of historical and sociological reasons for this, reasons too complex for holiday exegesis. For now, it's enough to say that the pool of shared experience among SEC fanbases, dysfunctional as we may be, brings us closer.
Close enough that it's not that difficult to imagine the SEC football coaches breaking bread together on this Thanksgiving. Hey, it could happen. And if it did, I expect it would look a lot like this:
- Mike Bobo would serve clam chowder for dessert instead of pumpkin pie. Because no one is expecting it.
- Georgia Southern would show up uninvited, sit in Will Muschamp's chair, and refuse to pass the potatoes, or anything else.
- A top offensive tackle prospect would tell Mark Richt he was coming to dinner, but then change his plans after Hugh Freeze calls and tells him he could bring his girlfriend to Ole Miss's dinner.
- Les Miles would take the creme brule out of the oven 10 seconds too late.
- James Franklin would bring the paper plates and napkins then act like he made the whole meal.
- Stephen Garcia would pass out on your couch after dinner. But to be fair, he did that after St. Patty's Day, too.
- Nick Saban would invite 37 guests, but cook enough food for 25 of them.
- Nick Marshall would have no idea where your dinner roll went when you got up from the table.
- Bret Bielema and Nick Saban would get mad at Gus Malzahn for telling them to eat faster.
Feel free to add your SEC Thanksgiving suggestions in the comments. And have a safe, happy Thanksgiving. Yes, even you Coach Muschamp. Until later...