Barometer or Thermometer? The Buy Week

Chris Graythen - Getty Images

Yeah, we've got us a buy week? No, I didn't spell that wrong. Since I've (temporarily) lost my zeal for anything to do with watching college football, this is the week where my wife drags my bones to the mall. Get it!

Hello, everybody. How are we feeling out there in The World? I suppose time is the magical healer of things and it is with great effort that I pull myself up out of my funkified lethargy, pull off my headphones and quit listening to Johnny Cash's version of "Hurt" over and over and over. I think I'm about through the worst of it...

Anyhoo...it's that time of the week where college football gets all meteorological in an occluded sort of way as we pick some interesting games that could be classified as "Barometer" (state of the program) or "Thermometer" (the temperature of a blazing Lay-Z-Boy any particular coach may be squattin' in) as we kick off week #7 in the College Football Season.

#13 Oklahoma @ #15 Texas (ABC, Noon)

See, this is what happens when the Big 12 starts playing like the Big East...and loses. You get relegated to a noon (11:00 in the A.M. CST) start. We still have two ranked teams that, apparently, are going to slug it out for 2nd, 3rd or even 4th place in the Conference, cause I ain't so sure K-State isn't going to roll over, either. If I wasn't so damned depressed, I might watch this game because there's a TON of pressure to win this one. Bob Stoops hasn't exactly thrilled the Sooner fan base of late, and Mack Brown's squad just flat got lit up last weekend against the 'Eers. The winner of this game gets a little breathing room, but the loser gets a lot more scrutiny. We have two evenly matched teams, I believe. I think the state of both programs are pretty similar...and the loser is going to start getting some heat.

Verdict: Thermometer

Duke @ Virginia Tech (12:30, ACC Net LOLZ)

Never in a million years did I ever think I'd be including The University of Duke and Virginia Polytechnical Institute in one of these meteorological analyses. Hell, I didn't even know Duke played football until last week. They're 5-1 and haven't been this success since Steve Spur....oh, nevermind.

What in the Sam Hill is happening in Blackburg? Virginia Tech is reeling at the moment. They're a young team, but are just not playing very good football. I think this is just a hiccup for Frank Beamer & Co. and they're probably developing some kids, but it's odd when The Hokies are out of the National Conversation. This is the epitome of a Barometer game. It's tough to play in the House of Beamer, so if the Dookies win they look like a solid bowl team. We'll probably have to play 'em in the Chik-Fil-Peach Bowl. Shoot me.

Ole Miss @ Abruuun (12:21, SECNet)

Admit it. You are going to watch this game. You're going to drag your substantial behind up out of bed a little bit earlier than normal, take the kids for a Happy Meal at Mickie D's, stop by your favorite grocer on the way back for some long-necks and Gordo's so you can be back in time for the Sooners/Longhorns Rebels/Tigers Tilt-O-Rama. I'm intrigued because (outside of our own debacle) I haven't seen a worse overall performance than Auburn gave last Saturday in a long, long...well, since Auburn's prior worst performance. And Ole Miss has found some offense. They certainly are ahead of schedule in Hugh Freeze's (now there's a great weather-centric name) first year in Oxford.

This is Auburn's 113th home game in a row, give or take. It's another brunch start and word has it down on The Plains that some players aren't exactly getting along so well these days. ALL IN, 2012. Karma, she's bitchy...but evidently goes all the way on the first date (teehee).

Look, Chizik's seat is just one Kelvin away from spontaneous combustion...so the whole Thermometer thing is a given. This game is going to go a long, long way in determining how low one program has become and how optimistic another has a very good reason to be.

Verdict: Barometer

#17 Stanford @ #7 Notre Dame (3:30, The Tom Hammond Show)

Notre Dame is #7? I just cried a little. Someone hold me.

#3 South Carolina (snif) @ #9 LSU (8:00, ESPN)

Not that Georgia gave South Carolina even a mediocre game, but there's got to be a little bit of a "comedown" factor for the 'Cocks as they head into Death Valley on a Saturday night against an LSU team that has absolutely no offensive identity at the moment. This game could be another low-scoring affair, just like the LSU had against Florida last weekend. Make no mistake, LSU still has some defensive horses. It's just when they stay on the field all afternoon, they tend to get tired. And, they've got some key injuries at linebacker, which doesn't bode too well when facing Marcus Runoverus.

If South Carolina goes into Red Stick and wins, I'll become a believer, but am hesitant because I still am not convinced that the Georgia team that got typhooned last weekend was anything but an anomaly. I'm not denying it happened, but I don't think the Georgia team we saw a week ago could've beaten Auburn. And that's pretty low praise. Anyway...

Verdict: Barometer

Tennessee @ #19 Mississippi State (9:00, ESPN2)

Tough time slot in the most bizarre stadium located in the most bizarre town in the Conference. To just get to Starkville by car literally means you really want to go there because it ain't easy from any direction. In fact, no GPS device can accurately guide you to this particular city. The only reason Dan Mullen is still there is because he can't find his way out.

Anyway, Tennessee is certainly capable of scoring points, and Mississippi State seems to play pretty good defense, with an average offense. This one will be close and will be a pretty good indicator of how far Dan Mullen's Dogs have come, and if Tennessee is about to catch a little lightning. Tennessee should be rested and Coach Dooley, recovering from hip surgery, will be calling this one from the press box. Tennessee will give State a very good test which lends itself to good Barometer game. We're about to find out if the Vols are on the right road after their good showing against Georgia, or if Mississippi State as good as they've looked for the most part this season.

O.K. folks. That's it. I'm tired, still pissed off and my roof has $4000 of water damage because of the 237" of rain we've had in south Florida this summer. I'm getting tired of this weather thing. I should've been a lawyer.

Go Dawgs!

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