Why is Cocktail Thursday being posted very nearly on Friday? Because Mike Bobo helped me write it, and if I've learned nothing else about comedy from Coach Bobo it's that you never lead with your best stuff. Think this will be the last Mike Bobo joke in this post? You're going to be sorely disappointed.
If the Georgia Bulldogs have a game this weekend against the defending SEC East champions and you've been waking up in a cold sweat from nightmares in which Mike Bobo runs your retirement account (right up the middle, out of the shotgun with no tight ends, natch) you probably need a drink. Allow me to help.
In the past I've recommended, among other things, Wild Turkey prior to Bulldog contests against the poultry from the Palmetto State. The aim has been to slightly tweak the avian mojo, to throw it off just enough to give the 'Dawgs the advantage in a game which usually requires a little bit of luck under the best of circumstances. This time around I'm hoping that we'll be able to borrow a little of the feathered kismet which badly outgunned teams from Columbia seem to have used for years to get the better of heavily favored Bulldog teams from the Classic City. This week, I suggest you kick the Columbia bird flu with the Famous Grouse blended scotch whiskey.
The grouse is the national game bird of Scotland, and the Famous Grouse is the most popular scotch in Scotland. That's got to count for something. It's like being the most popular BBQ joint in the South, a recommendation in and of itself. It was also the drink of choice for several characters created by W.E.B. Griffin, which probably tells you something about both the author and the scotch.
I could talk about what I think we need to do to win this weekend. But I think we all know that haters are gonna hate, and Bobo's gonna Bobo. The best scenario I can imagine has the Bulldog defense playing solid against the run and Stephen Garcia having one of those games in which it appears he's had too much scotch the night before. Until tomorrow . . .