Announcing the Dawg Sports Literary Competition to Bring the Georgia Bulldogs Good Luck Through Poetry
by T Kyle King on Sep 21, 2011 8:45 AM EDT
in Georgia Bulldogs Football
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PrintIt goes without saying that I am a superstitious sports fan. Tiny variables can have an enormous impact, and there is no telling which of several factors will be the one that tips the scales between victory and defeat, so it is imperative that we repeat what works when we stumble upon a formula for success. That is true of Mike Bobo’s offensive play-calling, and it is true for fan superstitions.
That is why A Boledogge’s Tale by Cherokee’s Grip made me so nervous. Don’t get me wrong; it was wonderfully well written, and I enjoyed it immensely. It’s just that . . . well, we did just this sort of thing last year, and it ended badly.
In this instance, though, it ended well, and I, for one, would prefer to see the good times continue to roll. Accordingly, I’m calling for a repeat performance this week. You are welcome and encouraged to offer a literary ode, within the fairly broad confines of the site guidelines but otherwise in the form of your own choosing, in the fanposts, between now and 4:00 p.m. Eastern this Friday afternoon. The best of the bunch will be promoted to the front page, and the determination which is the top contribution will be influenced heavily by the comments and "Rec"s each posting receives.
Have at it, Bulldog Nation. Who knows . . . maybe we’ll even succeed in impressing Margaret Soltan.
Go ‘Dawgs!
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(twitches and Drinks)
Concision, oh Lord!
for we are a wordy lot
and speak many truths.
"If we score, we may win. If they never score, we'll never lose."
-Erk Russell
You know this argument goes already. )
"One thing I will never do as long as I’m at Georgia is lose to Florida." - Herschel Walker
You ain't lived until you've been...
"If we score, we may win. If they never score, we'll never lose."
-Erk Russell
by DavetheDawg on Sep 21, 2011 9:50 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I can't say I disagree with her response.
It is very difficult to impress people so preoccupied with their own impressiveness.
Sacrificing goats, chugging Maker's Mark, and walking underneath The Arch.
by RedCrake on Sep 21, 2011 10:15 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Impressive...
I personally think she has a thing for Kyle. She’s trying to act like she’s not impressed, even peeved a bit. But deep down, Basic Instinct.
RUN KYLE, RUN!!!
Success is never final. --Winston Churchill
M.S.: "Mr. King, you have a MASSIVE blog"
TKK: “I’m sorry, it’s the… it’s the pleats. It’s actually an optical illusion. It’s the pattern on the pants: It’s not flattering in the crotchal region….Nothing to look at: go back to work, everyone.
…Don’t act like you’re not impressed!”
Sacrificing goats, chugging Maker's Mark, and walking underneath The Arch.
by RedCrake on Sep 21, 2011 1:49 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I mean, that scene hurt me.
i will never understand that movie experience. As I was “pain in the gut” belly laughing, people were walking out of the theater in droves. I guess I have the sense of humor of a 3rd grader.
"Uvarum, Uvarum Fit, Uvarum.... double Fit..."
- Augustus "Gus" McCrae
by Munson's_Marbles on Sep 21, 2011 1:54 PM EDT up reply actions
There are two kinds of people in this world:
Those who love Anchorman and those who do not. I don’t care to know the latter.
Sacrificing goats, chugging Maker's Mark, and walking underneath The Arch.
Outstanding
I wonder if her on-going snark war war with this site will merit an entry in her Wikipedia page… when she gets one.
Most excellent.
Deep within her heart she loves it. Attention for her and she can enjoy the thing she claims to hate.
Besides, it is writing genius to entitle a piece “Plenty of Funny Shit in This”. It was self responded to with a LOL.
It’s also entertaining to read her bio, which gives links to see her “in all her glory”. Ah, to write one’s on bio.
Ms Soltan, I know you are there…..I see you behind the veil. We don’t mind, enjoy the superb writing here on this blog.
"One thing I will never do as long as I’m at Georgia is lose to Florida." - Herschel Walker
Yeah, well.
I dig bitchy women. Always have. I especially dig educated bitchy women. And she gets an extra partial point for her loose connection via marriage to one of the true geniuses of the 20th century.
And it’s pretty clear we already have succeeded in impressing Margaret Soltan. One way or another.
We should invite her to the Goat Roast! Nothing that fine BBQ won't fix.
"One thing I will never do as long as I’m at Georgia is lose to Florida." - Herschel Walker
Wow. Just . . . wow.
Apparently, “sarcasm” isn’t in the course curriculum.
By the way, do you suppose she has Dawg Sports in her RSS feed, or was she just Googling herself?
Go 'Dawgs!
by T Kyle King on Sep 21, 2011 12:08 PM EDT up reply actions
She's a lurker. I "feel" her presence.
"One thing I will never do as long as I’m at Georgia is lose to Florida." - Herschel Walker
I wonder how long it will take her to be cowed . . .
. . . into taking down the above posting, the way the least challenge to her presumption caused her to take down the last one.
Seriously, if she wants to read through, say, the three-part “The Sound and the GameDay,” or the baseball writeup co-authored by Cormac McCarthy, Tom Wolfe, and William Faulkner, and say they sucked, fine, but don’t assume that, just because I’m a sports fan, I lack literary sophistication. That’s just ignorant, baseless condescension.
Go 'Dawgs!
by T Kyle King on Sep 21, 2011 12:20 PM EDT up reply actions
Just wait until you read my Richt, Bobo, and Grantham road trip story... written in the style of Flannery O'Connor.
Sacrificing goats, chugging Maker's Mark, and walking underneath The Arch.
by RedCrake on Sep 21, 2011 12:25 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
I can't wait!
Seriously, would it be wrong for me to go over there, and, without being snotty in response, simply leave in a comment links to the three parts of “The Sound and the GameDay” and the McCarthy/Wolfe/Faulkner postgame report?
Go 'Dawgs!
by T Kyle King on Sep 21, 2011 12:29 PM EDT up reply actions
Part of why I love dawgsports.com is how it presses me.
It presses me to improve in my knowledge, writting, debating. Having heard of Flannery O’ Conner of course, I realized I have never actually read anything by her. So I did the wiki thing and read her bio, which was very interesting. Some of her quotes about the south are amazing. So, now I am a touch smarter, will likely Kindle a book from her, and I am really looking forward to a Coaches road trip story; I can’t imagine how much fun that will be.
Thanks RedCrake!
Disclaimer: my work computer and keyboard just suck, and cause a great deal of grammatical pain.
"One thing I will never do as long as I’m at Georgia is lose to Florida." - Herschel Walker
"my work computer and keyboard"
I will have to remember to use that one. I have just been too blatantly open about my stupidity!
"Uvarum, Uvarum Fit, Uvarum.... double Fit..."
- Augustus "Gus" McCrae
by Munson's_Marbles on Sep 21, 2011 1:48 PM EDT up reply actions
I can type really fast, however, my keyboard and computer tend to not agree with me (at work) and lag.
Also, I use google chrome at home which is wonderful for spell checking. No such luck at work.
"One thing I will never do as long as I’m at Georgia is lose to Florida." - Herschel Walker
I hear ya
And I agree wholeheartedly on the “presses me to improve” piece of your comment. This blog raises the bar for those of us that are “That Guy” in training.
"Uvarum, Uvarum Fit, Uvarum.... double Fit..."
- Augustus "Gus" McCrae
by Munson's_Marbles on Sep 21, 2011 2:02 PM EDT up reply actions
At this juncture in my blogging skills...
… my standard go to rebuttal, on just about every point, is summarized in one word:
“…Dude…”
"Uvarum, Uvarum Fit, Uvarum.... double Fit..."
- Augustus "Gus" McCrae
by Munson's_Marbles on Sep 21, 2011 2:08 PM EDT up reply actions
You know about how the more you hate a thing the more you like it? (or something)
Her posting on student athletes and athletic programs make me think she actually is quite jealous. She has a piece that athletics are sucking money out of academics, and could barely make it without doing so. We all know how false this is. The irony is, as a liberal, its athletics that are allowing so many of these kids to get in college when they otherwise wouldn’t be. I thought that was their position, to get in college. I would say it is much more elitist to say student athelets can’t make the cut than to allow them a chance.
I dare say I lack literary sophistication, however, I will also add I am not an idiot because I like the sportz.
"One thing I will never do as long as I’m at Georgia is lose to Florida." - Herschel Walker
Googling herself?
Come on Kyle, I thought you were running a family-friendly blog here!
Success is never final. --Winston Churchill
Wow there are world's within world's in here.
I had no idea that this character even existed. I have been spending some time getting caught up on Margaret Soltan… pretty interesting stuff.
How did this happen? Why did she ever take notice of Dawg Sports? Why would she mingle with the primates in such a way?
"Uvarum, Uvarum Fit, Uvarum.... double Fit..."
- Augustus "Gus" McCrae
by Munson's_Marbles on Sep 21, 2011 12:28 PM EDT reply actions
Somehow, she picked up my Jeremiad (literally) on Mark Richt, . . .
. . . and flippantly mocked it, prompting a respectful response from hailtogeorgia which ultimately led her to take down her original posting. I was reminded of her existence when searching the archives for the links in this posting, so I decided to drop a throwaway line about her, and here we are!
Go 'Dawgs!
by T Kyle King on Sep 21, 2011 12:31 PM EDT up reply actions
This is where being a military officer has helped me so much.
1) know your audience
2) know your enemy
I happen to know so many people here and their education level, jobs, experience, etc, and I am always amused when someone attempts to do a drive by (either here or on their own sites). Drive by here with a spray and pray and you are going to get sniped from an L shaped ambush with highly trained individuals.
"One thing I will never do as long as I’m at Georgia is lose to Florida." - Herschel Walker
By the way Kyle, I like how Seinfeldian that was.
The subtle reference to an obscure (not really, but work with me) event from last year.
Success is never final. --Winston Churchill
I still can't believe she took the whole thing down.
That chaps me to this day. If she’s changed her mind about views, or if she feels she posted something in error, then by all means, own it and state it. Don’t remove it from the website entirely as if it never happened…by doing that, she’s no better than all of the corrupt proles she dismisses on a regular basis. A blog, to a certain extent, is like a diary, with some posts showing maturity and well-thought-out actions, and others showing mistakes that the poster wishes they could take back. Ultimately, by taking out a post that /GASP/ actually got an intelligent, well-measured response from a reader of someone she chose to glibly dismiss, she’s trying to cast herself in a better light (or perhaps prevent some of her readers from seeing that we aren’t all a bunch of mongoloids).
Ultimately, it’s just such a cop-out in so many ways. For someone who acts with an air of constant self-awareness, it seemed like the type of thing children playing a game they’re about to lose would do (i.e. don’t actually lose the game, just turn the gaming console off or throw the chess board across the room, whatever).
by hailtogeorgia on Sep 21, 2011 4:18 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Yea, I re read the old thread - I said she should "woman-up" and "get some balls"
I don’t think she expected any sort of intelligent reply; she is more of the “drop nuke and run” type.
"One thing I will never do as long as I’m at Georgia is lose to Florida." - Herschel Walker
If I remember correctly (I am about to get corrected by "that guy")
She actually blogged on something from here, and got called out, (read: destroyed) with things like facts and what not, and she pulled her post.
"One thing I will never do as long as I’m at Georgia is lose to Florida." - Herschel Walker
There is "Snark" and then there is "Snoot"
I can handle the first and even find it somewhat endearing. The “Snoot” factor however, I will seek to destroy and dismantle with the power of a thousand suns.
"Uvarum, Uvarum Fit, Uvarum.... double Fit..."
- Augustus "Gus" McCrae
by Munson's_Marbles on Sep 21, 2011 12:44 PM EDT reply actions 1 recs
Those suns are reserved for Vineyarddawg...
and the Gators. Sorry, but Ms Soltan deserves not this level of hatred. Disdain, pity even, but not hatred on the level of Florida.
Success is never final. --Winston Churchill
No no ... no hatred intended for Ms Soltan here.
I do not know very much of her. Just more of a commentary on the nature of “snoot” in general.
"Uvarum, Uvarum Fit, Uvarum.... double Fit..."
- Augustus "Gus" McCrae
by Munson's_Marbles on Sep 21, 2011 1:51 PM EDT up reply actions
Ok...just wanted to make sure.
Leave those suns alone. We need all the power this universe can throw our way for those despicable wretches in the swamp.
Success is never final. --Winston Churchill
Are "1000 suns" property of Vineyarddawg?
I did not know… in that case I will use the power of 999 suns.
"Uvarum, Uvarum Fit, Uvarum.... double Fit..."
- Augustus "Gus" McCrae
by Munson's_Marbles on Sep 21, 2011 1:58 PM EDT up reply actions
LOL...no, not the property.
Though he is known for his burning hatred of a “thousand suns” for the Gators. Hence, please don’t steal any of his mojo. We need it.
I hate Gators too, just with the passion of 2 ex-wives (which may compete against 1000 suns).
Success is never final. --Winston Churchill
I own no copyright...
… to the notion of hating something with the fire of a thousand suns being powered by the fire of an additional thousand suns.
But I will say this: you gotta hate something an awful lot to assign that tag to it. :-)
by vineyarddawg on Sep 21, 2011 4:06 PM EDT up reply actions
Auburn work out for ya?
add to that list all things:
• Florida
• Georgia Tech
• splinters
• pictures of cats
• when someone makes light of the passing of Uga
• Florida
• Auburn
"Uvarum, Uvarum Fit, Uvarum.... double Fit..."
- Augustus "Gus" McCrae
by Munson's_Marbles on Sep 21, 2011 4:18 PM EDT up reply actions
Actually, I'm a very kind and compassionate guy. :-)
I’m generally pretty easygoing, though the hair on my neck starts to rise up when a random troll treads upon Uga’s memory/legacy. As for the others:
Auburn? They’re just loud, annoying cheaters.
Tech? They’re just nerds.
Splinters? Just grab a pair of tweezers and a needle.
Cats? Just click the title of the post, thereby hiding the picture.
But Florida? I’ve got to tell you, my nordic-stationed friend… we all have our character flaws. Some men drink too much, some men womanize too much, and some men do too many drugs. My character flaw is that I hate Florida with the fire of a thousand suns being powered by the fire of an additional thousand suns. The only thing in this life I hate more than Florida is the real-life Devil… and I’m not completely convinced that he’s not a lifelong Florida fan.
When I see any logo related to the U of F, I mentally recoil. When I’m walking through a customer’s office and see U of F memorabilia in a colleague’s cubicle, I develop a facial tick. And when I see any person on the street wearing U of F clothing, I do a double-take and usually alter my course so as to remain as far away from the offensive clothing as possible.
My obsession with the hatred of all things related to the University of Florida is unhealthy and unnatural. I have reached a point in my life where the feelings are 100% institutional and not personal, however, and I can (and do) maintain close relationships with certain people who are active Florida fans. They know, however, never to discuss this fandom within a 2-week window of the annual tie in Jacksonville, no matter the result. (And on the times Georgia has won, I do not discuss it with them unless they bring it up first.)
So, if your enmity reaches a similar level in your life for any of those things, then by all means, I urge you to feel free using the “thousand suns” moniker. If it falls short of that lofty mark, however… well perhaps you can just say that you hate those things with the fire of a hundred suns, or ten suns. :-)
by vineyarddawg on Sep 22, 2011 1:00 AM EDT up reply actions
Fair enough...
… you speak wisdom my good friend. I will hear and heed your words and reduce my hatred for Florida to 698 suns, Georgia Tech; to 12 suns, splinters; I will say that I really do not like them and then go get my tweezers, Uga’s memory/legacy; I will seek some therapy and practice some breathing techniques, Pictures of Cats; I will use the nifty technique you have suggested and save the rage, but for Auburn… I hate with in a way I did not quite fully understand until I read of your feelings towards Florida.
When reading that I realized … hey this is me and how I am towards Auburn. I do not hate the other things on my list with the same ferocity as I hate Auburn. So my friend I thank you for your guidance in wielding the power of hate. I am fully locked in now and I am directing the full energy of my “thousand suns” in its proper direction. I hate Auburn!
"Uvarum, Uvarum Fit, Uvarum.... double Fit..."
- Augustus "Gus" McCrae
by Munson's_Marbles on Sep 22, 2011 3:03 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Got my submission in
Here.
I did something different since I was pretty sure I couldn’t do the Flannery O’Connor piece justice by Friday. I’ll get around to that one, but it’s going to take some serious time and planning so it might be a couple of weeks.
Sacrificing goats, chugging Maker's Mark, and walking underneath The Arch.
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