FanPost

You're on notice, dawg! G-Day edition.

Well, basketball season is over, and you know what that means... it's still soccer season in Europe for two more months!

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For any bandwagon-jumpers, my favorite club would like to remind you that this is the point of the season at which they usually excel (being typically out of contention for any meaningful hardware but safely free from relegation, and therefore without any stress to weigh them down). (Via)

 

With cultures being what they are, however, I think most people who read this blog would find it far more interesting that spring football season is winding down, culminating in a public intrasquad scrimmage that we refer to as a "spring game." LSU, South Carolina, and BOOM University held their spring games yesterday (I hate BOOM University), and this Saturday brings our our own spring finale:  the 2011 edition of the G-Day game.

For those who are not already aware, the G-Day game will also be the first leg in the trifecta of events being collectively attended by the DawgSports family this Saturday; an event which I have just this very minute unilaterally named the "2011 DawgSports Georgia Sports Orgy Day."  (I can name it this without any concern about an honor code violation, you see, because I will be attending my grandmother-in-law's 80th birthday celebration on this day.  Well, and because we have no codified honor code to break, which is not to imply in any way that we act without honor.)  Anyway, the point is: Come join the DawgSports leaders and regulars this Saturday!

I'm letting the following people know that, for the 2011 G-Day game, you're on notice, dawg!

In no particular order:

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1) Michael Adams - Why Michael Adams?  Because he's a jerk, has stolen money from and is a disaster for University, and everybody that has ever worked with him hates him. Plus, I have it from a very authoritative source inside the UGA administration that he intentionally enticed multiple football players to emerge from an alley last week at the Butts-Mehre Building. Fortunately, the heroic officers of the ACCPD that he had also lured to the location just stood there staring at him before aimlessly wandering back to the downtown area to find more minors in possession of alcohol.

 

2) Washaun Ealey's hamstring - Ealey's hamstring has kept him out of most of spring practice, and Mark Richt admitted that they were trying to bring Ealey back slowly to make sure the injury isn't aggravated and made worse.  Washaun has never had a hamstring injury before, so let's hope he doesn't overdo it when he gets back onto the field.  I know he wants to show out on G-Day so all the fans will start cheering for him again, but he needs to remember to keep his eyes on the ultimate goal: September 3 in the Georgia Dome against the Boise State Broncos.  That's the game that matters.

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You can't run this state if you're not on the field... so make sure you get healthy and back to full speed!


3) Injuries to other players - All of the "I'm picking Georgia to win" jokes notwithstanding, the only way that this game could be a huge disappointment/failure is if any player gets injured seriously enough to cause him to miss real games in the fall.  In fact, 18 players missed yesterday's closed scrimmage with minor injuries.  We've had quite enough of the injury bug in the past, and I'll thank the (negative) football gods just to steer clear of Athens this Saturday.  (Hey, negative football gods... you know they're also playing spring football that day in Tuscaloosa, Fayetteville, and The Lovliest Village on the Plains, right?*)

 

4) Vineyarddawg - Look, I'm starting to think that this guy doesn't really exist.  This user account just shows up one day and starts commenting and authoring a few odd FanPosts, but every time a DawgSports outing is planned... this guy is nowhere to be found?  That's just weak. 

Ok, well, I'll allow that someone who posts under his name exists, because these witty posts don't write themselves.  I really am starting to think, though, that Vineyarddawg is in fact a Florida Gator fan who lives in Gainesville and just suffers from a huge case of self-loathing and pity.  And Vineyarddawg, if you want to prove me wrong, you'd dang well better drag your butt to one of these DawgSports events soon!

 

5) Selective Service in the State of Georgia - As you might or might not have heard, this year's Red and Black squads will not be divided by the assistant coaches into "first team defense vs. first team offense" and so forth.  Instead, a la first-grade kickball, captains for the two teams will be chosen, and they will select their own teams.  For those of us who have already forgotten that professional league they used to call the NFL, this is more properly known as a "draft." 

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No, not that kind of draught... a much less exciting kind of draft.(Via)

Now, I'm not a politician, so I wouldn't go so far as to suggest that this might be the first step towards implementing the real draft in the state of Georgia... but I dislike this idea so much that I might suggest that anyway.  (DRAFT!  Be scared!  They gon' send your menfolk off to die for no reason!  Oil!  9/11!)

How are you going to be able to accurately gauge the progress your team has made if you can't see the first team defense play the first team offense?  If your first string center is destroying the fourth string nose guard just because your team captain didn't understand the finer points of live draft strategy... well, that's not very useful at all, is it?  I'm willing to give Mark Richt the benefit of the doubt because... well, because if he's not proven right this season, there may be no more benefit left to be given. 

I guess I'll just hope for the best.  (twitch)

 

6) Michael Adams - There's so much to call him out for that I had to enter his name twice.  This entry is in honor of his performance on HBO's Real Sports documentary of college football, which was so evasive and slimy that HBO felt it necessary to show almost just as much footage of the Georgia football team as it did of the Auburn football team.  Thanks a lot, Mike.

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Willie Martinez loved that interview, by the way.  It was aggressive, yet completely useless.(Via)

 

7) The Florida Gators - I don't care if their spring game is over, and we won't see any more Sunkist-and-blue uniforms until August.  I still hate Florida.  In the face of all reason and responsibility, I am already looking towards October 29, 2011, as the end-all and be-all date for the 2011 season.  The Sunshine State Saurians are primed for a relatively down season in the first year under a new coach, and Georgia has a solid core returning, needing only solid leadership to finally flip the coin in Jacksonville.  This has to be the year.  It simply has to be.

I hate Florida.

 

8) Students with tickets - Oh, sorry... force of habit. Admission this Saturday is, in fact, free, and a capacity crowd is not anticipated (we're not all as crazy as Alabama fans, after all).

 

* - Not that I wish permanent injuries on any football player.  (Considers whether to qualify Florida.) (Decides to include Florida in spite of his hatred.) (I hate Florida.)

 

Barring any unforeseen event, this should be my last "on notice" post until the football season starts.  It will undoubtedly be a long summer, so everyone soak up every last drop of football while you can!

Go Dawgs!

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