FanPost

Interview with an oddsmaker.

As it turned out, Vegas was correct.  What was the line prior to kickoff, anyway?  I think it was something like 12.5 points over the Auburn Tigers, and that turned out to be just a little bit of an underestimation.  Every time I see the Vegas line come out, I wonder to myself, "Just who is this oddsmaker?"  Well, I made a few calls and called in a few poker chips to exact a favor and I'd like to introduce you to the single most influential soothsayer in all of Clark County, Nevada:  The one, the only...Nostradamus.

Nostradamus_portrait_medium

Nostradamus.  He sees things.

Here's the excerpt from my exclusive interview with the man himself.

DavetheDawg (DtD):  First of all, uh, Nostradamus, I want to thank you for taking part in this interview.  I know it was short notice.  

Nostradamus:  The bathroom is down the hall, first door on the left...oh, and thank you.

DtD:  Uh, how did you know I had to go to the bath...ohhh, right.  You're Nostradamus.  You're good, you are.

Nostradamus:  Thanks.  I hear you're a weatherman.  How come none of you guys never actually call me?  My rates are the best in town.

DtD:  I dunno, man.  Pride, I guess.  With computer models and everything these days we really think we have a grasp on all things meteorological.  

Nostradamus:  Well, you don't.  Man, I love the weather.  Except for Jim Cantore.  Dude makes me nervous.  Saw him on while on vacation in Panama City once.  Ruined the whole damn weekend.

DtD:  I wish I had known you were available.  Man, I've got to follow you on twitter.  All this time I thought you only did sports...

Nostradamus:  Oh, heck no.  I'm calling the 2012 Presidential Election right now.  Jesse Ventura.  Book it.

DtD:  God help America.  I guess the Republicans aren't going to have a viable candidate after all?

Nostradamus:  What's really worrisome is that Jesse Palmer is going to win in '16.   

DtD:  I feel nauseous.  Back on point, I've gotta ask you...did you set the line on the Auburn-Georgia game?

Nostradamus:  Why, yes.  Yes I did.  And I know that it seemed to Bulldog Nation a bit over-the-top, but if you could see what I obviously saw.

DtD:  Well, what did you see?  I know we've made improvements but this series is historically tough for the home-team.

Nostradamus:  It usually comes to me in a dream.  And what I've been seeing in my mind's eye is a burly man standing on the Georgia sideline.  You call him "Grantham."  I call him "Money."  Anyway, he's got an aura that is larger than most.  His energy is extreme.  His will is divine.  This guy is rare:  He's kinda' like a larger and less-green Yoda. 

DtD:  This is very cool.

Nostradamus:  You need a break?  You've really got to pee...

DtD:  No, dude...that can wait. 

Nostradamus:  To continue, this "Grantham" not only has the ability to adjust at the half, he can make adjustments after a series.  You know what we call people who can do this?

DtD:  Adjusters?

Nostradamus:  No, dummy.  We call them underpaid.

DtD:  Word.

Nostradamus:  I picked a rather large points spread because I knew this "Grantham" had the power.  It's a force. The spread would've been more like 28, but I've got to try and keep it a little bit real around here or they'll make me go back to that damn Keno.

DtD:  Good point.  And great job.  Okay, now I've got to ask.  We've got a pretty bad Kentucky team coming to town on Saturday but so much is on the line.  Have you "rolled the bones?"  What are you feeling?

Nostradamus:  This game has weird energy.  I'm seeing...I'm seeing...cupcakes.  No, wait.  I'm seeing an early start...

DtD:  Dude, c'mon.  Everyone knows that game is destined for a Jefferson-Pilot ESPN SEC Network 12:30 kickoff...

Nostradamus:  You're not hearing me...I'm seeing an early start for Kentucky...

DtD:  What!  They're gonna get a lead...?!?

Nostradamus:  Yes.  Georgia is going to come out a little bit flat early.  They might even fumble a punt or kickoff or something and Kentucky jumps ahead.

DtD:  Man, you're making me nervous...

Nostradamus:  Relax, Dave.  It'll only awaken the Graken.

DtD:  Hey.  That's my meme. 

Nostradamus:  It's cool, but your photoshopping skills need work.

DtD:  What can I say.  Dawgsports hasn't given me a graphics budget.

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We do need a bigger graphics budget...

 

Nostradamus:  I hate the man!

DtD:  Please homie.  You're killing me!  We're going to win, right?

Nostradamus:  Relax, Dave.  It'll be ugly for about 3 or 4 series.  But this bunch of young Dawgs have talent. 

DtD:  Good to hear.

Nostradamus:  I'm seeing big things down the road, too.  Really, really big things.

DtD:  Do tell, Do tell!

Nostradamus:  Sorry, man.  You'll have to wait.  Info like this is worth some serious moolah.  Anyway, Dawgs win 38-10. 

DtD:  About what I expected...

Nostradamus:  No need to risk injury.  You'll get to play the bench.  Gotta focus on Tech soon. 

DtD:  Thanks, pal.  Can I check back again?

Nostradamus:  Anytime.  By the way...I'm seeing a plague* headed towards The Loveliest Village.

DtD:  Locusts?

Nostradamus:  No.  Lawyers.  They're coming from...wait...wait...it's a bit fuzzy...Indianapolis? 

DtD:  But they were cleared...

Nostradamus:  Trust me.  I'm Nostradamus!  By the way...3-12-13-24-45   Powerball 9

*in no way was Nostradamus inferring that lawyers are a plague.  We seriously love us some lawyers 'round here.

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