Four Ways to Break the Georgia Bulldogs' Malaise

… but my interpretation of that option is that podunkdawg will cook enough brownies for everyone, then mail one to each person, and we will all enjoy them together at a prearranged time.

With this scenario, no matter how the battle on the field turns out, everybody wins.

… tonight in the second round of the NCAA Women’s Tournament, the Georgia Lady Dogs defeated Oklahoma State, and did so on Arizona State’s home court. Not only that, but in doing so, they achieved Coach Andy Landers’ 750th win as a collegiate coach (all at Georgia).

Congratulations to the Lady Dogs and Coach Landers. Now, I don’t want to break my pessimistic mojo, but surely this has to be some kind of positive portend for the future, right?

   And it’s all my fault!!! The Columbia Branch of the South Carolina University has been saddled with what we affectionately call “The Chicken Curse” for decades now. Look over www.chickencurse.com for some funny details.
   Anyway, it isn’t anything to joke about, and anyone can “catch” it if they’re not careful. George Straight got it from playing the Colonial Center and had larangitis (sp) for a week after exclaiming “Go Cocks” during his show. A couple of years later, Kenny Chesney broke his foot coming onto the stage to start his show in Williams-Brice Stadium…while wearing a Chicken jersey.
   There are numerous stories through the years of things such as this. My contraction involves the agreement with my brother-in-law that SCU is a fine institution for International Business while driving the truck I bought from him a week earlier…with the SCU decals still on it for that long. This all happened a week before the ’Bama game in ’08, and I have dealt with personal misfortunes since!

But, there is a cure (please stay with me here, this is legitimate stuff here)……

   In late 1999 my dear friend, UNC ‘98, felt it wise to put an SCU foam finger on his hand and dance around sarcastically in front of his then roommate, SCU ’98, mocking him in every way possible after a disasterous 0-11 campaign on the gridiron. Everyone took notice and feared the worst for said friend because of our Sandlapper roots and knowledge of do’s and dont’s considering Chicken paraphanalia.
   Within 1 week, his life dramatically changed. Deaths in the family, fiancee’ leaving him for a new beau she literally had just met, he was laid off, was in a terrible car accident, and just general rediculous crap happening to him…that is, until March 2000…

   After a few drinks one night discussing his recent debacles in life, my dear friend finished a pint of Guinness, placed it softly on the bar, turned to me and softly and pitifully said, “Joe, I’ve got the Chicken Curse…it’s too obvious because of how everything has fallen apart on me since I put that damned finger on and pranced around” Without turning my head, my eyes grew the size of baseballs, and I nearly fell off the stool. I realized he was right! Unfortunately, at that moment I wasn’t concerned with comforting my friend, I was concerned with getting as far away from this person as soon as possible!!! But, there was soon a bright day in history…

   A week later a group of us were up in Charlotte, NC at a Hooters…hey, they have a great Buffalo Chicken Sandwich…..when a couple dozen Maryland fans began crowing about their victory in the semifinals of the ACC basketball tourny. They mocked and taunted my friend because of his Tar Heels garb, sending him into a furious bout of anger. Upon being asked to leave, my friend swore to hex the U of M with all things holy…including pulling for Duke in the next day’s ACC final.
   With all of his heart, he pulled for Duke to win the ACC Championship over Maryland in a way that caused me to wonder about his loyalty to the powder/baby blue. Duke wins the 2000 ACC Championship.
In less than a week, life took a great turn for this fellow. He got his job back, within a month or so he met his now- wife of 5 years, and UNC has notched 2 NCAA Titles before his watering eyes.

   There is a cure!!!!! I have brought this curse to our fair University, and for that, I humbly apologize. I acknowledge that I should have NEVER agreed with even the Pope that SCU was fine at anything, and I should have scraped the SCU decals off the glass, and removed the “seatbelted chicken in a car wreck” tag from the front immediately after buying the truck!!! But, I didn’t, and we have struggled nearly everywhere since.

   Since it has effected us all, I beg each of you to do one simple thing. It’ll be over with in a hurry, and it won’t last. You cannot hide it from those around you, but you can sit in private to do this……….we must pull for Tech for one game on the gridiron….with all of our hearts. Kyle, you can probably pull for the Towls of the Plains if you like, considering your detestment of that particular institution. But we have to do this.
   I don’t look at their schedule, so maybe Kyle or someone could choose a game we can all be satisfied with, and go for it together….but it must be done…preferably the first game.

   I know this was a long post, but I had to explain it in detail so that y’all will understand the seriousness of this curse. It’s not a joking matter! My humblest apologies to everyone, and the University of Georgia itself for my lack of discipline and failure to heed the warning signs the Good Lord was giving me the week of my contraction. But, there is a cure!!!!

Damn it all to hell….and go tech :o(

   That’s been my demeanor all day today since admitting that and the actual typing what I said…about “them”. After discussing this with several close friends, it seems to be unanimous that you have to pull for your rival, with all of your heart, in a meaningful contest.

   Everyone seems to feel that something like cheering for “them” in a Super Regional Final (to make it to Omaha) should suffice. It just has to be meaningful, and the inflicted soul must pour his/her heart into that contest for their rival.

   I asked if it were possible to do both, Super Regional AND gridiron but I got a quick grimmace and sharp jerk of the head to the side followed by a “nuh uh”. Has to be legit, and a one-time deal…“not something to be toyed with” I was told.

   So, what to do? I say root for them 100% in the SR Final if it’s against a tough opponent and there’s actualy satisfaction in them winning. If this can’t be achieved i.e. they don’t make it, then I say we aim for their game @ Kansas on Sept 11th. It’s your call, sir.

I guess this is literally being in the Dawg house, isn’t it?

and, you know, block and tackle and stuff.

asked me last night at a gathering (after seeing my belt with the oval G’s on it), “Do you have ANYTHING that doesn’t have a Georgia G on it???” I said, “No, why? Do they make things without it?”

In typical U of Tinner-see fashion she responds, “Uummm……..huhhhhhh???”

However, I did wear a plain Nike t-shirt (white, black swoosh) to the gym today. But, I did buy it @ Tate. Oh well.

Woof woof woof!!!

One must be careful about these things, as any error could bring down the plan. I like option two, but how do you define the set of people who are “Dawg Sports readers”? What if someone gets left out? What it someone participates who shouldn’t? Is it enough to comply with the spirit of the superstition?

if the one’s who do read consistently follow the instructions. Don’t you think? Those that do will be pulling the weight.

Think of it as a turnover inside our own 5 yard line, and the defense making a goal line stand on 4th and goal.

Sometimes part of the team has to “pick up” the other part of the team to win the game.

Teamwork fellas, I just hope someone will jump in the air backwards and “back-bump” me when I come off the field. Just have an ambulance ready for when I finally come back to the ground!!!