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The Emergence of "Hip Richt"

After the 2007 season, the most popular new coach in Bulldog Nation was Evil Richt (a/k/a Dark Richt). We didn’t see much of that guy in 2008, perhaps because casting a nice guy in the role of the bad boy simply isn’t sustainable in the long run, particularly in a league that already features the Armani Bear and Corch Urban Meyers. (Conversely, casting a bad girl in the role of good gal works like all get-out, as anyone who saw Eliza Dushku in a cheerleading uniform in "Bring It On" knows full well. If you’ve never seen "Bring It On," put your television on the USA Network, sit down, and wait. If you have to wait more than 48 hours before you see it, I’ll be surprised. They seem to have it on a recursive loop, like "It’s a Wonderful Life" at Christmas.)

Paul Westerdawg has called our attention to Chris Low’s piece on the Mark Richt of 2009. The gist of the article is that Coach Richt is going old school, which I am all for, but I detected in the article the emergence of the latest incarnation of Mark Richt.

Check out these quotes, both from the Bulldogs’ head coach:

We absolutely want to win a national championship. We have the goal set to do that. But the national championship goal is one you really don't control. You can control winning the East and control winning the SEC and then hope two other cats on the other side of the country didn't go undefeated.

People notice the starters and notice the signees. They forget about all those other cats in between.

That’s right, ladies and gentlemen. Mark Richt just used the word "cats" twice in one interview, and he wasn’t talking about kitties either time.

I believe we are seeing the emergence of Hip Richt.

It fits him, when you think about it. Mark’s not dark. He’s exactly the antithesis of evil, so those images were never really suited to him. Have you seen him on the sideline in the shades, though? Mark Richt is one cool customer. As we found out in the "hobnailed boot" game in Knoxville, he has the resting heart rate of a jewel thief, a marathon runner, or Hannibal Lecter. After a big win, he’ll plant a big smooch on his best gal right there on the field. He’s all class.

Also, he kept Willie Martinez and Frank Sinatra let Peter Lawford hang around, too, so there’s that. Picture Coach Richt in a tuxedo smoking a cigarette while holding it cupped inside his palm, grasping the filter with his thumb and forefinger, and the image is complete. He’s suave and lethal. He’s Hip Richt.

Hear me now and believe me later. If Hip Richt and the ‘Dawgs win the S.E.C. championship this year, we’re going to see our head coach and half of his starters go out to Las Vegas to film "Richt’s Eleven."

So, who would you want those players to be? Jeff Owens, definitely. The Ginger Assassin, certainly. Orson Charles, undoubtedly. A.J. Green, indubitably. Who else would need to be added to the team for Hip Richt and his hep cats to pull off a heist?

Go ‘Dawgs!

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Well played...

I say that we need Ben Jones right beside Mr. Owens for ‘added’ muscle… and then Blair Walsh could be the ‘stunt man’… you know, back flips over laser beams and stuff like that…

cookin and smilin

by cookin and smilin on Mar 27, 2009 8:16 AM EDT reply actions  

He's just playing catchup still

Urban Meyer has been using “cat” like that since he got to Gainesville.

/tongueincheek

by Year2 on Mar 27, 2009 8:32 AM EDT reply actions  

Most definitely..

..Rennie Curran. For the extra badass-ness.

by DawgGirl32 on Mar 27, 2009 9:42 AM EDT reply actions  

Aaaand....

Carlton Thomas could be like the little asian guy contortionist. Okay that’s a stretch. But I do think if we’re going to have a “Richt’s 11” we need to figure out who’s going to be Brad Pitt, Matt Damon, etc. I assume Richt is Clooney and “the water girl” is Julia Roberts, or Tess. I’m kinda liking this. :)

by DawgGirl32 on Mar 27, 2009 9:45 AM EDT reply actions  

As you mentioned...Orson Charles is critical...

While everyone else is pulling off the heist, Orson must distract onlookers by knocking stuff over with his ass.

"Who knew that Florida would one day hire a coach that made us long for the graciousness and dignity of the Steve Spurrier era?"

Thus sayeth T. Kyle King

by RedCrake on Mar 27, 2009 10:44 AM EDT reply actions  

Richard Samuel

can be one of the bruisers

and what about Bacarri Rambo just because?

is Munzenmeier still on the team? He can be the guys that’s always drunk

by UgaBulldog14 on Mar 27, 2009 12:48 PM EDT reply actions  

Richts 11: cool cats of the Classic City Canines

Here’s My 11

1. Mark RIcht- He is Frank Sinatra as a football coach
2. Damon Evans- He’s the slick Financier of all the big jobs.
3. Coach Sereals- If he can put together an O-line from scrap he can be the master planner of any heist
4. Geno Atkins- Cause Geno is such an Italian name, plus he is such a BA
5. Ben Jones- He’s freaking crazy, and would mess up anyone who messed with us.
7. Orson Charles- He’d be Don Cheadles Character, blowing everybody’s National Championship trophies
8. Joe Cox- You always need a hitman, and who better than the Ginger Assassin.
9. A.J. Green- He’s got great hands, therefore he can “lift” and pick-pocket people smoother than M. Damon
10. Jeff Owens- smooth talker of the group, perfect replacement for Bernie Mac
11. Larry Munson- The Godfather, we all just kiss his ring and do what he says.

Who are your 11?

Do you not know that those who run in a race all run, but only one receives the prize? Run in such a way that you may win.

I Corinthians 9:24

by Southern Dawg on Mar 27, 2009 1:31 PM EDT reply actions  

Haha

I totally had Jeff Owens as my Bernie Mac.

On a completely unrelated note: Anyone hear about the stalker who tried to find Shawn Johnson on the set of Dancing with the Stars? Anyways, really crazy guy. They found duct tape and two loaded guns in his car. He claimed that God told him he needed to have a child with Shawn Johnson. Reeeally creepy. What school is he a graduate from you ask? Why that would be the great University of Florida! They really do breed the best.

by DawgGirl32 on Mar 27, 2009 2:01 PM EDT reply actions  

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